Thursday 10 October 2019

Ten Ways to Start A Fight and Wage Plastic Wars

A Long Time Ago, in a galaxy  far, far away...

CELLOPHANE WARS



I am sick of it!                     So sick I am tired!

        Like totally sick of all the bloody plastic wrapping!

What the fuck is going on with companies who wrap plastic...
                IN FUCKING PLASTIC!!! ???

The product is already protected by plastic...we need no more plastic....

FUCK!!!

First Blood started out as a lengthy drama about a Vietnam vet struggling to adapt to normal life; Stallone hated it so much he wanted to buy it and then destroy the print; it was then re-edited into a 90 minute action movie and the rest, as they say, is history. Rambo was born!

First Blood on Blu-Ray Here

Now when you get your blu-ray or dvd of First Blood, because you know you're intrigued by the movie even though you haven't seen it for years, just take a moment to marvel at the amount of

FUCKING CELLOPHANE THAT IS WRAPPED AROUND IT!!!!!

I'm going on a cellophane war, shops...you have been warned.

Interesting geek moment - Beverly Hills Cop was originally an action movie stated for Frank Sinatra, and then Sly Stallone himself. Just imagine, we would never have had Axel F from Harold Faltermeyer or Glenn Fry singing The Heat Is On. (Sinatra doing Axel F would have been interesting)

Hey...here's another geek fact, Prince did the soundtrack to Batman in 1989 and was meant to do it with Michael Jackson. Take a peek at this interesting video from Midnight's Edge:


So you've now all probably realised that plastic is a real bug of mine, I hate the stuff, I mean I really hate the stuff. What makes me so mad is that the world is becoming more "aware" of plastic and companies are failing to do anything about it.You know we didn't ask for all this plastic shit right? We just seem to be in a position where it has been forced onto us. It's getting worse! I remember heading into Our Price or Sam Goody and picking up a cd or dvd in its plastic case and being able to open it and see a disc and read the interior and now it's all covered in plastic shit. Why?

Oh well, you see, people can steal the discs and then place them in their pockets and the like. 

Ok, then put bloody tags on the disc or something! Do something else with all your brainpower and technology - this option is cheap, brainless and destroys the planet - 

You fucking morons!

Broccoli in plastic !!! - apples in plastic ???!!!!! 

I can steal a bloody apple that's wrapped in plastic - it does not need to be wrapped in plastic!!

Aaaaahhhhh! I'm melting into my own boiling pot of despair and frustration!

Right, e-nuff, which is not an electronic drug. I am going to calm and think of lots of things that aren't wrapped in plastic, like...

erm...

Baked Beans?

I think you'll find that a four-pack of beans comes in plastic wrapping.


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I've drawn a line, which means I am moving on (for now) from plastic. Here's a picture from an old cereal box that I used to eat.


Here you can play your own game of The Black Hole, from classic 80's Disney flop, The Black Hole. Now, you need to get a dice I would think, and perhaps print this out and cut it out using an adult with a pair of scissors. Then, you choose a colour of your choice and you can be VINCENT, Maximillian, Cygnus (which is a spaceship) and Pizer which is a stupid name for a human pilot; then you have to get sucked into the black hole I think, I can't remember. The only thing I remember about the film is Anthony Perkins, or Norman Bates of Psycho fame, getting killed by a robot with propellors and trying to protect himself using a book. Yes, you read that right, a book. As you do. He should have called his mother. 

I am reminded often of my ability to see into the future, who reminds me? You'll have to find out, but the point is this, wait for it....

I guess you don't have that same ability. 


Here's some ads:

What A Waste by Jess French   a book about plastic and all the bad crap we are doing.

Zero Waste Home by Bea Johnson  another book about being a jolly good citizen

And finally my own little book is here and ready to be eaten by a hungry horde of thrill-seekers. Huggers tells the story of one woman struggling against a activist movement with a hidden agenda to send disease across the globe. It's good and cheap, 99p for Kindle owners. 

Huggers for Kindle is HERE


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